For
Beatrice Stack life was shutting down now with the passing of husband Clem, a
big noise in the City, just when she’d almost overcome the pain from the
shoulder replacement and taken once again to slipping down to the pool for
water aerobics, Wednesday mornings, which had done nothing for the lardy
sagging of her upper arms, but she needed company, desperately. Married for sixty years, she frequently muttered, shaking her weary head as
if struggling to suss out where she had misplaced so many days, no, years! Now, whenever she returned to their
apartment up the stairs at the end of the turn-off to the pool on the second
floor, she expected Clem to be there, lying in wait with his feet up, poring
over his share portfolio to the end, someone to talk to, a familiar face who
instinctively picked up the threads of their life and wove them into their very
own patterns of narrative. Naturally,
she still insisted on her three offspring phoning every day to make sure she
was bearing up, doing ok, pulling through, but these shudderingly cold days no
way did they know her every thought like Clem seemed to, as if wired into the
sockets of her tired old brain.
So
that now the very apartment was shrinking, shutting down, threatening to
smother with shadow. With a start, she
noticed the clanging slam of the heavy gym door nearby and faintly heard or
imagined the ding of the bell as the lift arrived at her second floor. Yet she could barely make the effort to
leave the building, until the necessity of slowly plodding down to Coles to
sniff around for some sustenance. Why
bother?
Nonetheless she kept her regular weekly appointment with Basil at the
hair salon – just a small room with basic sink and shelving adjacent to the
so-called business office with solitary computer – for a touching up of her
thin grey curls with gingery streaks of dye.
Just
quietly, the management office that faced the residents lounge noticed Mrs
Stack was no longer filching sweet bikkies from the cake stand and squirreling
them up to her own apartment.
‘Those
biscuits are meant to be for all the residents, not just her,’ Irene would
relay indignantly to Maxwell from behind her desk in the office.
‘Yes,
she does seem impervious to guilt,’ he added, fearing that Irene, who liked to
have a handle on practicalities, knew he too was culpable but too cagey to be
spied upon.
By
turns, raising one leg up, one down in the swimming pool, Maxwell almost choked
at a sudden booming clang from the outer door.
Why are the ERAs so violent? he
groused, his steamy reverie broken.
Craning round to glimpse the usual suspect, Emergency Relief Assistant
Doreen, Maxwell’s jaw dropped. Holy
mo! Shock waves!
For
there instead was Beat Stack, staring straight ahead, swaying with grim
determination and heavy plod, eyes glued straight ahead to the far wall, not
even glancing across to where Maxwell was splashing around. What was she doing here at this time
of night?
Oblivious, evidently, her robe gaping open, so that flabby breasts
stretched sideways rather than pointed forwards. A repulsive sight, but he nevertheless felt some spurt of
sympathy for her in spite of his own embarrassment. ‘Beatrice!’ he called out
in a restrained voice that echoed above the bubbling spa. ‘Beatrice!’ more
urgently, to stop her plod before she turned toward him, in full frontal
exposure, at the far end of the pool.
As
if lost in thought, she focused for the first time on the stick-like figure
opposite, whose neck was sticking up out of the water like the stem of a sodden
cabbage.
‘Where’s
the toilet?’ she whimpered.
‘You’ve
just passed it,’ he said, gently because he suspected something odd. ‘In the women’s change room. ‘Look, I’ll get out of the spa and go round
this way,’ indicating his retreat on the nearside of the pool to avoid
confrontation and further embarrassment for the two of them.
‘Where’s
the way out?’
‘Just
walk back the way you came.’ This
is the weirdest.
Utterly
bewildered, dejected even, she turned round, failing to readjust her robe, and
scuffed back in her slippers to the exit, listing heavily, still billowing
amidships.
What
kept the bereaved Beat going was to hunker down in front of the tele to watch
her beloved Kangaroos, the blue and whites, muttering through gritted teeth at
the opposition that included umpires:
Car’n, ya Kangas, belt the living suitcase out of that arse’ole! Butt ‘im in the breadbasket! That ugly unit hasn’t got a scone,
umpie! ‘Yamaggott, that’s tiggy
touchwood stuff! E never laid ands on
the piker!’ Then quietly sank into a
reverie about her late Clem, who would often claim, ‘There are no accidents in
Aussie Rules, Beat.’
‘Did
you hear what happened to Viv and me?’ said Mervyn, sidling up with wincing
smile, winding up for a long-winded story.
‘What
was that, Merv?’ said Alexander Farthingale, a beanpole of a man who towered
over all-comers in the residents lounge, his hardness of hearing turning him
into a bewildered old sourpuss.
Besides, the impending procedure on his second hernia was hanging over
him and causing niggling discomfort.
‘I
said, “Did you hear what happened to Viv and me?”’
‘No. What happened to Viv and you?’ Alexander
chimed in like the fall guy in an old music hall routine, mechanically.
‘Last
week, Monday morning, there was a sickening wake-up call for Viv and me,
terribly sickening. Persistent ring
ring ring from the dread of night.
Police. Your son-in-law’s been
killed in a road accident.’ Mervyn’s
face froze, mouth yawed in disbelief at his own words, eyes haunted wide-open.
‘Go
on,’ murmured Alexander, just registering after some seconds, impatience now
jostling with curiosity.
Mervyn
cranked himself up with a hitch to his trousers. ‘A woman driver had stepped on the accelerator instead of the brake,
skidded across the pavement skittling my son-in-law. Took out the fence and front gate. Day after his forty-third birthday an’ all. He was just taking his son to St Leonard’s.’
‘Oh? That snobby educational factory down
Brighton way?’
‘Right. Killed outright, instantly. We can’t believe it. How someone’s life can be snuffed out just
like that. Like a mozzie blitzed on a
bug zapper.’ Quick as a flash, he
slapped the back of his hand, jolting Alexander’s head back. ‘A computer designer on the oil rigs on the
top of his game. We still can’t believe
it, Viv and me. But it was on the news,
rubbing our faces in it. It’s turned our
lives upside down. Left our daughter in
a right mess. No more thoughts about
our holiday in New Zealand. We’ll have
to cancel now.’
‘Unbelievable,’
said Alexander, accentuating each syllable slowly, his jaw sagging with the
weight of imagination kicking in.
‘Just
goes to show, doesn’t it?’
‘Why,
yes,’ pondered the gentle giant.
Eventually, ‘What does it show?’
‘You
can’t be too careful these days, can you?’
If
he trusted you, Lester would always engage close-up, toe-to-toe almost, but
those clear blue eyes held a confidential twinkle that made you warm to
him. The octogenarian had been missing
for some weeks, but Maxwell caught up with him in the gym. Breathing hard but rhythmically on the
pounding treadmill, he slowed to a halt with ‘Half an hour’s long enough,
otherwise it gets boring,’ he gasped, stepping down. ‘After eighty, you can quite suddenly experience a sharp drop in
energy. Take Shirl. She likes her walker, something to hold on
to, thank goodness, because she can’t see the cracks in the pavement. When we walk around the oval, we cling on
tight to each other. But as soon as you
stop exercising regularly, at our age, it’s impossible to start where you left
off. We’re both eighty-seven and
various parts of our bodies are running down or dropping off. I’ve got big problems with my big toe. Too much treadmill. Or tomatoes. If it’s not one, the other will be the death of me. After half an hour’s brisk walking, my big
toe gets very sore. There’s a lump
underneath, which worries me. I can’t
seem to get rid of it.’
‘Have
you tried walking on uneven ground?’ suggested Maxwell. ‘Makes the muscles on your feet clench with
every surface variation.’
‘Sounds
bloody painful. I prefer the straight
and narrow. Thirty minutes every
evening before happy hour.’
‘The
treadmill I can’t stand. Too robotic,
too mechanical. You’ll get flat feet.’
‘Won’t
matter at my age. This lump under my
big toe. What d’yer reckon?’
‘Check
it out with the podiatrist quick smart,’ said Maxwell, recently relieved
himself by the very youthful, bespectacled lass who came on Friday mornings,
who’d given him hope that his own fungus feet could be cured in six months with
a dextrous flip of the clippers on cracking, crusted, white-streaked toenails
daubed with Lamisil cream. In fact, he
felt proud of the fact that he knew all about problem feet.
Lester
shifted nearer, limpid blue eyes fixed on Maxwell, searching. ‘There’s no point,’ he shrugged. Just a hint of a wry smile but a steady
gaze. ‘I’m ill.’ A couple of slight but knowing nods, a
lower voice: ‘Seriously ill.’
Andrew
the chef, nicknamed Andre by the more frivolous resis, slipped out the
automatic sliding door into the front garden to snip small bunches of flowers
to garnish the tables for that night’s
meal. Roses out the front weren’t much
chop because of the very hot weather,
the petals barely lasting. Which was
disappointing, since he liked to surprise the oldies with little personalised
touches to the evening meal, such as writing out name tags in neat sloping hand
for that night’s diners, eight to a table, and providing a small dish of
chocolate creams for each table.
Ducking down by the flower beds out front, hoping that his distinctive
white chef’s coat wouldn’t be seized on by manager Maeve Warren, who’d get
snippety over his vandalism, especially since it was on her recommendation to
give a facelift to the flowers bordering the fishpond, the central feature of
the forecourt. It was she, Maeve, who’d
delivered a heavy hint to Jess, the florid-faced gardener beneath the bush hat,
that the surrounding flowers should be varied in height, colour and foliage to
create a more densely textured impression than each bloom leaning wanly towards
a uniform height. She didn’t want to be
reminded of her own most senior human charges fading away.
Since her second marriage, well into her
forties, Maeve Warren, the manager of Chiltern Towers Retirement Village, had
seemed more rounded, physically speaking, than a posh Porsche. Happier too, apparently, as she chucked
fewer wobblies, abrasive Bernie excepting, though she wobbled rather than
walked, her wobblers leading from the front and her too short, tight-hugging
skirts retreating from behind.
But the surprise installation of a
shiny new coffee machine donated by the new owners, Twilight Living, was
causing unseen problems. For starters,
the tab for the requisite sachets of coffee amounted to $100 a week. Admittedly, when the containers were
cleaned, several unpunctured sachets were found gumming up the free flow of
liquid. Almost as bad as the large
brown wooden box of Twining Teas, whose distinctive flavours in their own
brightly coloured but hardly exotic sachets lined up in sections, were nicked
so quickly and smuggled to their apartments by certain recalcitrant residents
that the entire selection on display disappeared within a week, to be replaced
by mundane rows of tightly packed Lipton teabags in the same impressive Twining
box.
Secondly, unbeknown to Maeve, the
Emergency Relief Assistants took a while to master the system, forgetting that
the spout had to be washed and replaced at the beginning of every morning and
then rinsed. Often Maxwell, the
earliest resident down in the lounge before eight o’clock, was the first to
collect the spluttering squirt of rinsing mix, which Andre, alias Andre, would reassure was not harmful but meant a substantial reduction in the strength of the coffee as well as less liquid in the final cup.
o. ‘Not harmful?’ pondered Clay, the
junior maintenance bod in navy blue dungarees and size 14 boots, wound up in
vacuum hose and wires lassoed over his shoulder. ‘Mm, what about that message Descale
now! What allergies might milk
crust give youse seniors? Best leave it
to Andy.’
‘Probably right,’ decided Maxwell,
after rolling his tongue round his palate and detecting a slightly bitter
taste. ‘Handy Andy.’
But Andrew was secretly riding a
thumping dumping wave on the bet he’d placed at the beginning of the English
soccer season. If only he had wagered
on rank outsider Leicester City when the Foxes were 5,000-1 against, having
only just escaped relegation the previous season. Would have made a mint.
Even now, he was still ahead; three thousand pounds ahead. With nine games to go in the English Premier
League, these unlikely lads were still an incredible five points ahead of
second place Tottenham Hotspur and twelve ahead of Manchester United. Again and again, he’d prevaricated: Should
I cash in now? They must crack soon,
surely.
Instead, Andrew cracked. His wife suspected apnoia, as her normally
placid husband
began kicking out and muttering a long-drawn-out South American howl of g-o-a-l!
in the middle of the night. With
nerves stretched unbearably, evidence of fresh vegetables overcooked and drops
of a good red spilt on white tablecloths, he offloaded twenty-five pounds on
these minnows winning the premiership.
‘I stand to win a cool one hundred thousand pounds,’ he’d
frequently murmured, lips barely moving, eyes darting around. Premature retirement beckoned from Byron
Bay.
But the tea leaves were ominous. On Sunday he’d lost a small fortune playing
foursomes golf at Chiltern’s Menzies golf course. Betting forty cents on each hole, he’d tossed away $3.60 on
losing nine straight, the winner scooping the pool after every round. So pissed off was he, he’d advised his
golfing mates that he wouldn’t be
a gamester guru any more. He cashed in
the chips while still ahead on the Foxes, but narrowly. That secret of those upstart Foxes he kept
to himself. Not even his wife would
know of his penchant for piddling gambling.
After two years of living on the second
floor of Twilight Living, Nicholas Ferry was growing increasingly
frustrated. Although a member of the
five-persons residents committee, he was very much out on a limb, a stiff one
at that. Like a handful of upright
inmates, he wished to be of service, to be useful and busy, but had lost faith in the management. The first job that he undertook on his own
unpaid initiative was to provide felt covers for the castors of new armchairs,
so they didn’t scratch the floor
or depress the carpet. He could manage
three a day before boredom set in. His
next fad was to drive about the city
seeking long, rubber-webbed mats to cover the deck area of the swimming pool, whereas Maeve
Warren had bought cheap matting bone-hard for puckered soles and bunions. All this done for residents, but he still
found the manager a tight-wad with money.
After waiting eight months for a new stovetop, he and Hazel got tired of
Maeve’s delaying tactics for the expected upgrade. He dashed out to buy a brand new stovetop at an unexpected cost
to their own budget. Maeve Warren’s
niggardliness had again won the day.
On the main noticeboard outside the
business centre, Nicholas read that Maeve, a ‘mistress of spin’ in his eyes,
had declared that the recent feedback sheets to Twilight Living revealed that
over fifty per cent of residents had affirmed Twilight Living’s take-over,
whereas he reminded everyone that forty-nine residents did not vote at all, which had
skewed the percentage positively upwards.
‘You’d better watch out,’ Nicholas said
to Maxwell by the Mainstay bar.
‘Why’s that? Maeve on the prowl?’
‘Unfortunately, she had another hissy
fit. So desperate that she even asked
me to stand again for the committee.’
‘Well, you are very practical and
generous with your time. So you
offered?’
‘Naaah!’ replied Nicholas with a
vigorous shake of the head. ‘But I did
warn her there’s no one coming up through the ranks to run the committee. The demographic is jumping up. The first intake have pretty well moved on
to pastures greener, but the new recruits are already in their eighties and
most unlikely to want to be lumbered with any responsibility. In fact, we should re-examine what this
place represents. Originally, it was
designated a retirement village for the over-fifty-fives, then Twilight Living
renamed it a resort, but it’s rapidly taking on the appearance of an Old Fogies
alms house. There’s a new bloke on the
block, has a very distinguished English accent and old-fashioned manners. Asked me the other day, ‘And who
might you be?’ Forgotten his
name, but he’s eighty-six, doddery on his pins and very hard-of-hearing. Then there‘s that squinty-eyed woman with
deep male voice recently installed on the fifth floor, rarely comes out of her
room, but when she does she avoids eye-contact. That blonde ERA says she’s got
encephalitis, therefore mentally deficient in some way. These sorts of people should not be put in
here because they can’t cope and we don’t have the resources.’
‘So why are they then?’
‘Twilight Living needs to maintain a
high turnover, with the demand for retirement apartments in Melbourne rising rapidly. Michaela’s not going to concern herself
about an applicant’s health, so long as she scores a signature on the
contract. She’d receive a pretty tidy commission, as sure as London to
a brick.’
‘Is that London, Ontario?’ Maxwell’s smirk lingered too long.
No, London, South Africa, smart arse!
In spite of his popularity, both as a
warm, amiable person and as an obliging, capable chef de maison, Andrew, fondly
dubbed Andre for his yearning for the Paris of his student days, in
particular those sentimental memories
of Les Halles gutted long ago, whose snobbish garcons had despised and mocked
his French accent, had his down days. Having
surrendered an easy $75,000 dollars win thanks to those stubborn Foxes and
therefore sacrificed instant retirement, the tipster was now facing a glum
future. Arriving just before twelve o’clock Monday to Friday, he’d feel
dejected if the advanced weekly order showed a mere two tables to set up for
dinner. Mondays were fairly popular, as
the three main dishes were roast and the aroma wafted up by lift to the third
floor. But as the dining numbers were
declining, the new owners, Twilight Living, had brought in a consultant to look
over the standard weekly menu and suggest changes.
Usually most accommodating, Andrew
began snipping at the principle of holding a ‘special night’ in the restaurant
on the first Wednesday of each month.
But when the residents committee in their anxiety about the restaurant’s
profitability - and therefore long-term viability - sought to have extra
specials, such as a Bush Night with poetry readings; Mid-Summer Merry Madness
with celebrity dress-ups; Valentine’s Night for fuzzy sentimentalists; the
Grand Final Dinner, where residents with dodgy knees could dress up in their
team’s colours and blow whistles with fruity farts; and Christmas in July for
the Anglophiles and war-time refugees from Germany and Austria. Those ‘fun’ nights with entertainment
suggested by the social committee were well supported by sixty or seventy
diners, one bottle of wine per table paid for by the social committee. On the following nights, though, custom dwindled
markedly, stragglers at two or three tables sitting under a cloud of
gloom. ‘It’s too much for many of
them,’ muttered Andrew, ‘especially if they’ve been down for happy hour
too. They just want to be tucked up in
bed by eight-thirty.’ Looking busy was
impossible for the white-coated chef on long afternoons with nowhere to hide
but the confinement of the galley. He’d
much prefer to watch old black and white highlights of English soccer matches
from the seventies and eighties or The Two Ronnies on You Tube. Besides,
the recommendations for the revised menu went down like a stodgily fluffed-out
lemon bomb dashed with cinnamon, too daring by half. Those who had groaned at another roast pork or roast beef and
potatoes on Mondays now lamented the loss of their regular Monday dish at
Chiltern that had formerly been their traditional Sunday lunch at their last
family residence, their real home.
Throwing his hands in the air
despairingly as if about to tender his resignation, Andrew could not help but
groan inwardly: What more can one do
for flippin’ fuddy-duddy millionaires?
Excuse me, Maxwell,’ said Irene with
an awkward half-smile, her too slender black jacket appearing round a pillar in
the lounge, behind which the retiring septuagenarian retreated most dawnings to a doubly
cushioned purple armchair. ‘We’ve err
been given a new rule,’ her eyelids fluttering up to the ceiling in
embarrassment or disbelief or the discomfort of scratchy contact lenses.
‘Oh,’ replied Maxwell, with a wry
knowing chuckle. ‘What now?’
‘We’re not supposed to put out the
biscuits till 10.30, but I’ll give you something, a piece of fruitcake or a plain
biscuit, because you’re always here at eight o’clock and disappear by
nine. It seems unfair that you’re being
penalised.’
‘That’s awfully kind of you, Irene,
but don’t worry, really.’ Though
touched that office staff demonstrated genuine concern for his welfare, he was
hesitant about accepting special favours, for Mia had slunk in at the rear of
the lounge and was staring at the two of them, evidently straining to
hear. ‘Why the change in policy?’ he
said in lowered voice.
‘There’s at least one resident who
comes down every morning with a plate, helps themselves to a few biscuits and
scurries back upstairs. That’s just not
on. These biscuits are meant for all
residents. Encouraging them to have a
chat. I think I know who it is. Rather, who they are.’
While she was talking with animated
shakes of her head, eyes skittering, Maxwell was casually exploring the ceiling
for any surveillance cameras he had failed to notice. Never would he have been so careless as to bring down a plate,
but he had been inclined occasionally to snatch a chocolate finger while
depositing his empty cup on the side trolley, always watchful, of course, lest
anyone was trundling along the corridor from the west wing or round the corner
of the bar.
On the following Sunday morning, one
of the ghostlier mornings at the village, half a dozen perhaps going to the ten
o’clock service at St Michael’s, most others invited to the family lunch, when
the door to the main lift slid open to a yelp of pain, as Ross Welk, the
secretary of the residents committee, whose copies of the monthly minutes
pertained to the minimalist school, lurched out. With each painful shuffle he gave an edgy howl of pain.
‘What’s wrong?’ asked Irene, who
desperately broke stride from the staffroom on her flat black shoes.
‘I had a fall last night,’ he gasped
in pained frustration. ‘I can’t
walk. I think I’ve broken my hip.’
‘I doubt you’d be able to walk if you
had. Did you use your pendant to
contact the ERA on duty?’
‘I didn’t,’ he whined vehemently,
‘because when I got back into bed, I didn’t feel that much pain. I rang my daughter. She’d take care of it. But this morning when I tried to get out of
bed . . .’
‘He couldn’t manage it,’ added the
no-nonsense, middle-aged woman, a spitting image of her black-eyed,
heavy-jowled mother in bulk and domineering nature. Maxwell was put in mind of a dour-faced prison warden.
‘At least, you’ll be in the same hospital
as Cynthie,’ Irene tried to console.
‘No, I won’t!’ blurted Ross, with a
tantrum of childish peevishness. ‘And
Cynth knows nothing of this cock-up.’
‘Mum’s been transferred to Cowfold,’
explained the daughter with blunt matter-of-factness. ‘Cellulitis is a real bitch.’
‘What a pity!’ Irene, straining to stay even-keeled. ‘Why don’t you sit here till the ambulance
arrives?’
‘Another thing: I’ve got a bloomin’ committee meeting on
Monday morning,’ Ross groaned, as if struck by a blow to the paunch. ‘Irene, can you ring two people?’
‘Yes, of course. Who are they?’
‘Warwick Holman, president of the
committee, for the residents. And
Brenda, for the gossip.’
Who should plod slowly up to the
coffee bar but Beat Stack, Apt 111, who was recovering from shoulder surgery
and scarcely sighted these days in the lounge.
‘Good-o! I do like Andre’s dark fruitcake,’ she muttered, wielding a
patterned plate, her doughy, lipsticky face leavening. ‘Don’t you?’
‘Yes, but any chance of leaving me a
piece?’ Maxwell found himself saying,
irritation tripping over sarcasm, as he stared at the drooping flab of her
freckled right arm extending, while she loaded up the plate with half a dozen
slices of the chef’s studded fruitcake, then overlading it with Scotch fingers.
‘Wow, that’s some helluva sugar fix!’
But the stout woman with thinly
frizzed, gingery blonde hair possessed a tin ear. ‘I’ve left you some,’ she offered, beneath a frown of
indignation.
‘No, it’s ok,’ he shrugged, exuding a
woebegone sigh. ‘Don’t mind me. I can
go without.’
Ignoring him: ‘I don’t think I can drive any longer,
Maxwell.’
‘Your shoulder still keeping you up at
night?’
‘Yeah, but it’s not that. I’ve just received notice from the
RACV. I’ve just been slugged over two
thousand, three hundred dollars for car insurance. That can’t be right, surely.’
‘But it’s a Mercedes you drive, isn’t
it? That would explain it. You can always trade it in for something more modest.’
‘I couldn’t do that,’ she protested,
amazement giving way to disgust across her forehead and pinching lips. ‘Clem would never forgive me. Gee, I do miss him. Immediately I get home, I start a
conversation with the old bugger as if he was still alive. Just can’t kick the habit. Funny, ain’t it?’
So accustomed to being the solitary
swimmer in the pool in the evenings, Maxwell was irritated to hear from the gym
below a deep rumbling and bubbling of water above. Someone using the spa! He
briskly walked up the six flights of steps and discreetly pushed the door open
to pry. To his surprise, perched over
in the tiled-up far corner of the square-shaped spa, was an unfamiliar figure,
a youngish face - perhaps helped by the long, honey-blonde hair and subdued
lighting - looking directly at him with a clenched expression. Quivery with nerves at this intrusion, he
quickly changed into bathers and showered in a cursory manner, pulled in his
stomach muscles and boldly walked to the steps down into the pool. Suddenly she burst up from the water in
front of him.
‘Oh!
Scuse me,’ he said, taken aback.
‘I’m terribly sorry to disturb you.
I thought you were in the spa.’
‘I was. Now I’m in the pool. And
you don’t disturb me.’ But there was
something in the hollow-eyed stare that discomfited him.’
‘May I join you?’ he asked in an
unconvincing voice, confronted by that imperious air.
‘Of course, I don’t!’ she snapped.
Tentatively, because awkward and
self-conscious while fiddling with his goggles, he negotiated the steps. ‘I usually come down for a swim in the
evening. It’s very peaceful after
dinner. Usually.’
‘I know,’ she replied, in a tone of
hapless resignation. ‘I was deep in
meditation.’
‘I’m so sorry.’ And painfully cautious in his descent, just
like the older seniors.
‘Don’t keep saying sorry,’ she gurgled
with exasperation.
‘I’m sorry. Oops, there I go again.’
She was not amused. ‘You must be
a new resi.’ He was wearing his
sweetest smile.
‘God, no! My mother’s just come out of hospital. My older sister and I are caring for her.’
‘Oh, my name’s Maxwell, by the way.’
‘Sue Ellen, Hettie’s daughter. You’re obviously not Australian.’
‘I hope it’s not my stiff upper lip showing.’ No, but his teeth uncharacteristically were.
She snorted a laugh in spite of
herself. ‘My husband’s English,’ as if
to explain. ‘My ex-, I mean. He lectured at Cambridge.’
‘And what’s your line?’‘I was an English
teacher too. Another Aussie in Kangaroo
Valley. Cambridge, to be exact.’
‘Did you sit at the feet of Dr. Leavis
on the banks of the Cam?’
Again she snorted. ‘Good god, no! I’m no Leavisite.’
Maxwell relaxed a little, knowing that
she knew he knew of the literary critic.
‘Anyway, how is your mum?’
Immediately, her face tensed, eyes
watering over. ‘It’s very sad,’ she
murmured.
Maxwell bit his tongue. In a twinkling, she sounded so different,
shrunken to a woeful little girl.
Abruptly, she snapped. ‘Can we stop talking?’ She was pleading now, close to tears. ‘I’ve only been given half an hour’s
respite. Let’s swim! Race to the other end under water!’ And already she was arching into free-style.
‘I’m not a natural swimmer!’ he called
after her, sounding pathetic.
‘Well, I am!’ she gurgled. In a flash, she was several metres ahead, a
metre beneath a white ruffle. When she looked round at his floundering, she
cried, ‘That’s not under water. You’re
cheating!’
‘My head’s under water!’ he
protested.
For the first time, her open laughter
tempered any scoffing. She dived down
again and shot past him. When he
finger-tipped the wall, turned cumbersomely and dared to look, she had already
hastened up the steps and slammed the change-room door.
The following evening Maxwell, in
dressing-gown and slip-ons, dawdled down to the pool at the western end of the
second floor. Breathing shallow, so
anxious about laying furtive eyes on this girlish, grown-up woman. Her mother, Hettie, he would regularly bump
into before her recent hospitalisation, since her apartment was opposite the
lift and the rubbish chute. A gracious
lady always well groomed with a string of pearls about her neck and a beaming
smile of perfect porcelain teeth, invariably curious about this skinny man some
nicknamed Perpetual Motion. ‘Have you
been for a swim?’ she’d ask. Or ‘Have
you been out for a walk so early? I
really don’t know how you manage it.’
Yes, he did miss her spontaneous warm smile and the way those large,
round grey orbs would light up with a gentle inquiry. Now as he passed her door under which the morning sunshine would
bestow an orange glow, he strained to hear voices of the two sisters,
particularly the hauntingly sad face of the younger.
At first, the streamlined younger
daughter with long, loping gait bore no resemblance to her stout mother
clasping a walking stick with white knuckles.
Maxwell was struck by her greyish-blue owlish eyes, both startled and
startling; her dangerously slender figure in a one-piece cossie – none of the
resi women wore bikinis; at least, not at Chiltern Towers.
No longer was Maxwell thinking
blissful solitude in the pool. Next
evening, pushing the door open, he met with disappointment then relief that Sue
Ellen was neither in the enclave of the spa nor the sloshing wavelets of the
pool. With sinking heart, he shuddered
at the coldness of the water. He
couldn’t refrain from sneaking a glance towards the door for a shadow of
hesitant feet in the gap beneath it.
Instead he froze at the clang of the outer door to the passage, but it
was merely Doreen, the busily efficient ERA lady on duty, checking that no one
was lying face down in the water.
Then two nights later, after he had
swum forty laps more listlessly than usual, Sue Ellen ghosted in, wearily. Wearing goggles steamed up, he couldn’t at
first identify the intruder, then felt confused: should he surrender the pool to this guest of the Towers and
retreat to the spa? Or should he carry
on regardless, a leaseholder, therefore notionally a part-owner of the
establishment?
‘Bugger, I’ve forgotten my goggles!’
as she shyly descended the steps before suddenly diving across him with a
spray.
That’s against the rules! STRICTLY NO DIVING! The board clearly states! His first reaction, but he was relieved
not to have offered his plastic two-dollar pair, whose dearth of elastic was
knotted in several places to fasten cheap goggles to one’s scone.
Maxwell flung himself across
the water, intent on hugging the shorter side of the pool because of the entry
steps, so as not to impede this spiky lass’s lane, but was churned up in her
wake with a sore arm that kept bumping the exercise rail and nearside
tiles. All of a sudden, she was gone,
vanished. Then he espied her heels
first as she’d dived down and was now touching the far end of the pool and turning. Maxwell felt ungainly, hampered, sloshed and
swamped. Partially blinded, his eyes
stung by the leaky, misted-up goggles lost sight of her, but sensed that
somehow she was watching from below the rolled-up overhang of the pool cover.
‘Hello, how’s your mum?’ he
asked with an edge of desperation when she bobbed up behind him. He felt a hypocrite venturing this question,
a wet cliché frequently aired at Chiltern Towers, but this time he really
wanted to know. The dark blue rings
about her lacklustre eyes betrayed the reality.
‘Very grim,’ she practically
whispered, staring down at the widening eddies.
‘Oh, I’m sorry to hear
it.’ What else could one say?
‘It’s very sad,’ she added. ‘Mum won’t listen to either of us. She’s so stubborn in her old age. Rules with a rod of iron. Even though I’m fifty-seven, I still have to
fight her for half an hour’s R & R.
Would you believe, she spent two thousand dollars on a hearing aid that
she can’t bear to use for more than fifteen minutes a day. How’s that for stupidity? No wonder I can’t get through to her. All Meriel and I do is attend her bedside
like dutiful daughters must, just waiting, waiting.’ She brushed away a tear, then stiffened up. ‘Anyway I can’t stand here wasting time. Please look the other way.’
‘What?’
‘Turn round, for god sake!’
Standing in the heart of the pool,
staring out at the steamed-up night sky, he felt ludicrous. And dreadful that he’d offended her. The slam of the change room door behind him
gave his nerves such a jolt. It was the
last time he laid eyes on her, save as a pre-Raphaelite figment of his
imagination.
There was an electric charge in the
atmosphere. Maxwell was
apprehensive: twitching over the
prospect of a surcharge being imposed on every apartment to cover the regular
losses chalked up by the restaurant.
Just by chance, it seemed, chef Andrew had chosen to take his annual
leave back in his home town of Portsea, on the south coast of Hampshire in
England, to stay with his ageing mother and re-unite with his three brothers
for a touring holiday to the gastronomy of Lyons. In spite of that, he was looking glum, lacking energy, not even
fussing around the spluttering coffee machine that yet again was spitting
steam, water and stale milk from the rinsing process.
The meeting was travelling smoothly,
with Maeve Warren smiling through proceedings with searching eye contact over
the top of her glasses at the sixty-eight residents present, whose names she
was ticking off.
Then the barrel-chested octogenarian
president bedecked in navy blue blazer and open-neck white shirt tottered to
his feet. ‘The next item on the agenda
has been proposed by the resident body, a response to Twilight Living’s
memorandum that Emergency Response Assistants should not carry out private work
for residents.’
Spontaneous and unheralded, Dr Jiri
reared up from the second row facing Maeve on the rostrum, a tall, lumbering,
big-boned man, with a distinctive marbly accent. In a shake, the semblance of bonhomie splintered.
‘A few months ago, I spoke at this
forum to the effect that I was very contented in the friendly atmosphere at
Chiltern Towers. I have always been
able to do what I need to do, to come and go as I please, no questions
asked. I have never regretted coming to
spend my last years here among all these new friends and very warm-hearted
staff. In particular, I am referring to
the ERA ladies.’
Suddenly his voice rose to a boom of
blatant anger: ‘The price of
independence is vigilance! We are being
treated as prisoners in our own home.
When Twilight Living took over, their management team declared, when
asked, what changes would be made, replied, “You probably won’t notice
anything. Just a bit of tweaking here
and there.”
‘This is our home,’ he spelt out with
bawling emphasis. ‘We should have a say
in how our money is spent, not be instructed by some remote pen-pushers in head
office, Sydney, who know next to nothing about our needs. How dare they!’
‘Jiri, please . . .’ said Maeve in a
calm voice, over-ridden. ‘I do
understand, but . . . all the ERAs have signed the agreement to the effect: We abide by our code of conduct.’
‘Of course, they’ve signed it!’ the
doctor thundered. ‘They had no choice
if they wanted to keep their job.‘
Somebody in that awkward low-crouching
walk of Groucho Marx was slowly zig-zagging toward Jiri, unwilling to distract
the audience behind him but succeeding in doing just that by resembling the
humps of the Loch Ness Monster riding the waves between the shoulders of
bemused residents. None other than Dick
Bellchambers, treasurer of the residents committee.
The doctor’s eyes remained fixed
straight ahead at Maeve, whose deliberately modulated voice could barely be
heard in the sudden hush. She had
obviously taken those anger management hints to heart: ‘You must understand, Jiri, there is a
conflict of interest between the safety and health of the residents on the one
hand and a possible perceived exploitation of elderly people deemed
vulnerable.’
Reaching Jiri’s side, the stooping
figure tapped him on the shoulder while levering himself a tad more
upright. ‘Can I just say . . .’
Oblivious of the splutters of the
paunchy peace-broker hovering, Jiri ranted on:
‘If the ERAs had belonged to a strong union, this disgraceful treatment
would not have happened!’
Before Jiri could grab another breath,
a crackly-voiced Dick Bellchambers mumbled:
‘I move a motion that we allow these part-time workers to accept work
requested by residents. Some ERAs are
happy to work as carers for us. In
fact, this practice has gone on for several years.’ Breathing hard into the hand-mike belatedly proffered by Dr Hugh,
who was still fussing over whether the temperamental gadget was actually
switched on, Bellchambers said:
‘Twilight Living’s decision may well constitute a restriction of trade, since
now these ladies are only permitted to work two shifts a week. What’s more, award rates are disgracefully
low.’
Still sounding remarkably calm and
quiet but physically diminished on her chair, manager Maeve retorted: ‘Twilight Living will say their ruling is to
protect residents.’
Having remained a standing hulk in row
3, Jiri was raring to ride shotgun:
‘But we want to seek out ERAs we know.
We trust them. We don’t want
carers we don’t know wandering through the corridors of our prison. We don’t want autocratic decisions handed
down from some remote eyrie in Sydney, without any explanation, without any
attempt at consultation.’
‘Twilight Living are trying to protect
you . . .’
‘We don’t want their protection, we
want their assistance. We are a
fiercely independent mob!’
Cheers suddenly erupted amid the warm
round of frail hands clapping. Maxwell
was taken aback by the revolutionary fervour and sensed he’d better take sides
with the vocal majority.
‘I move,’ stammered Bellchambers,
holding onto Jiri’s chair, unable to straighten up further, groping for
succinctness through a staccato of gasps caught on mike, ‘that part-timers can
do work for residents privately, if requested.’
‘I’ll second that motion and put it in
writing straight away,’ jumped up president Holman, who must have felt it was
time to butt in and take hold of the reins in spite of the manager’s attempts
at appeasement, now that he had gauged a sense of the public will.
When Maxwell realised through
absent-mindedly scratching that what appeared as pink scars on his lower right
leg or mere grazes like insect bites developed into a glaze of pink, then red,
he suspected the symptoms were further evidence of skin rash inflicted by
excessive amounts of chlorine in the pool.
‘No, I don’t think so,’ said Jurgen,
the maintenance man, waylaid one morning by the central lift. ‘Every day the water left in the pool and
spa, its quality is checked. The
reading is within the parameters.’
‘I’m not doubting you, Jurgen, but I’m
jiggered if I know the cause of my skin becoming raddled with red marks.’
‘Yeah, well, it’s not the water in the
pool. I feed the test results in the
computer. Perhaps it’s the hot water in
the spa.’ Was there a mischievous
twinkle in his eye? Could the
maintenance jefe be taking the piss?
‘I admit that my lower legs sting with
the heat. In fact, around lap thirty, I
do get that itchy sensation along the tibia bone. Then it stings like billyo in the heat of the spa.’
‘Remember, if it’s catching, you’re
not supposed to swim in the pool. The
oldies might get whatever lurgy you’ve got.’
What the hell have I got? Skin sores? Eczema? Psoriasis?
‘What do you reckon, Clay? I have to wash my hands after a work-out in
the gym because my palms are filthy black.’
‘Best not pick your nose then,’
advised Clay. ‘Gyms are notorious for
bacteria. There’s one million of the
little nasties on each square inch of gym equipment.’
‘Jeez, that’s one hell of a
blitzkrieg. I dislike having my
personal space invaded. So what are you
doing about it?’
‘Nowadays I can actually feel
something whenever I walk into the gym,’ replied the gangling young maintenance
bod, wafting his hand up near cheek and shoulder. ‘I do wipe clean each piece of equipment, but by the end of this
job I feel . . .’ he shrugged his shoulders . . . ‘yucky’.’
At the commencement of General
Business at the July residents meeting, the president warmly welcomed back half
a dozen residents who were not travelling too well. Following the acceptance of the June minutes, it was an ominous
sign when Dick Bellchambers moved ponderously with small, shuffling steps to a
chair brought forward by the genial Clay to the front row. Dick’s bald cranium with grey tufts at the
side obscured the view of the quiet, passive, seriously deaf elders in rows two
and three, but they could smell a showdown.
The president must have wished for a dormant mouse of a past treasurer
instead of this prowler with jutting jaw.
‘But we residents at Chiltern were
deprived of the services of a most companionable and cheerful member of staff,
who loved to mix in, always willing to strike up conversation with those most
reluctant to say anything. Indeed, she
possessed the patience of Job.’
‘Dick, you’re still not
listening. I spelt out our position to
Twilight Living and asked them for a reply.
They in turn wrote back to say they were still considering our
request. The situation hasn’t changed.’
‘Yes, it most certainly has. Kylie’s been sacked! This would not have happened if the ERAs had
a union.’
‘Kylie was sacked for not signing the
Code of Conduct. Now, Dick, I say Let’s
do it in a nice procedural way, not like a unionist thug. Don’t you all agree with me?’ The hint of pleading in the president’s tone
brought forth a mere modicum of support from an audience unused to displays of
defiance.
Shelley with a large glass of red,
glassy-eyed and rubbery red-faced, gabbling away in a slur. Hurries away from the dining area, bored out
of her brain. No one needs me, she
thinks. I need someone to need me.
Which wasn’t Maxwell, when she turns
the corner to enter the lift, just as he issues from the inside fire escape
opposite, hoping to avoid other residents.
But not necessarily Shelley, who is
eager to buttonhole someone with a bit of pizzaz. ‘I did my usual round at Sabrini,’ she said, huddling up in a
confiding tone. ‘Made a point of
visiting Esme. Oh, didn’t you know she
had a stroke? Yeah, ten days ago. Her face hasn’t dropped lop-sided, but she’s
lost the use of her right arm. But with
her left hand she was doing fingers and thumbs, like the exercise for arthritis
we do at the end of water aerobics.’
‘So what’s the prognosis for
stroke?’ After four years at Chiltern
Towers, Maxwell was becoming more adept at speaking in medical terms, but
usually felt some physical sensation in his own body at the mention of someone
else’s near-fatality.
Shelley took another gulp of the good
stuff. ‘Too early to say, but she still
had her marbles. Told me how worried
she was she’d miss out on the residents annual raffle and you couldn’t claim a
prize if you weren’t present, and would I look for her tickets in her bag of
personals under the bed. Well, they
weren’t there, were they, and she started to fret. It’s mean, isn’t it, if they won’t give her a prize if she
wins.’ Head tilted, Shelley swigged,
tasted the residue on her tongue and smacked her lips with relish.
‘It’s the only thing I can taste,
wine, so I love a good drop of red, ‘cause I can’t taste any food.’ She was holding the glass up to the light
and gently swilling its ruby contents in fascination. ‘It’s three years to the month since my brother-in-law passed
away. He was fit, super fit he was, but
one evening he had a nasty fall. Fell
backwards and struck his back on a solid corner of furniture. Same evening, when he was urinating, he saw
he was pissing blood. My sister called
the hospital. Ambulance came and took
him there. Doctors sent him back home
later that night. He died a couple of
hours later. Punctured lung. See, doctors don’t care these days. First thing is, they look at your date of
birth, see if you’re worth saving. It’s
all wrong.’
She nudged him in the side, lowered
her voice. ‘I’ve got a letter in my
handbag telling them, Don’t revive me if I lose consciousness. Three times they thought I was about to cark
it on account of my aneurism.’ She
pulled back her hair from the right side of the forehead. ‘Have I shown you my shunt before?’
‘Yes,’ he said without enthusiasm,
noticing the obvious corrugation at both sides of her forehead, making that
ridge of bone stand out.
‘I refuse to go through all those
family goodbyes again, only to come back to life soon after. Just let me go, for god sake.’
It was all too much for Maxwell, whose
faint heart prodded him back into the fire escape and slowly up the concrete
steps to his apartment, where he took more care than usual not to bark his shin
on the coffee table, trip over the ruffed-up carpet or absent-mindedly press
his pendant.
Michael Small
February 28-Ocober 18, 2016